Sunday, May 28, 2006

Yesterday, I received this in the mail.




It appears San Pedro Times Michael T. Elliott is now officially missing. Anyone information leading to his successful recovery will lead to a reward of 1 Texas-Cold 24 oz. Lone Star. Further, it appears someone has solicited the Have You Seen Us? mailing sent out by ShopWise (you know, the annoying company that provides a list of useless coupons in the mailbox almost every day). As we can see, Elliott's age is listed as infinite, so it's peculiar the company has been able to do a 5 year age progression picture. Can anyone determine his actual age so that we can contact the missing children and missing person agencies to clear up this misunderstanding. Additionally, does anyone, anyone out there in the world wide web, know who Elliott was last seen with? Please, dear internet friends, help us find our lost Tribe correspondent before an unfortunate, malicious fate befalls him.

4 comments:

cut offs said...

I have seen this man. I think it was at the Austin bird watching center for couples.

im lauf der zeit. said...

judging by shopwise's age-progression, elliot will return to the mansion as moses. i'm kind of excited about that.

Vagrunt said...

And where would he sleep if he did come home?

Squawbrey said...

He has been replaced by a pseudo new tribe member...somebody has to pee on floors and not have lube.